2 min read

Let’s cut the fluff. Healing is not lighting candles and suddenly floating into inner peace like some Instagram reel with lo-fi music. Healing is ugly crying at 2 a.m., writing angry letters you don’t send, and realizing that yes, your coping mechanism is sarcasm... and snacks.

Welcome to the messy middle.

This is where emotional intelligence meets real-life breakdowns. Where mental health isn’t a buzzword but a lifeline. And where you stop trying to fix yourself like a broken machine and start understanding your emotional wounds like a complex, layered story.

1. The Myth of Instant Healing: No, One Journal Entry Won’t Fix You

Let’s be clear. Healing is not a weekend project. You don’t go to one therapy session, meditate for ten minutes, and suddenly reach enlightenment. If anything, you’ll likely feel worse before you feel better.

Emotional healing requires unlearning decades of emotional suppression. Emotional intelligence isn’t built overnight. It comes from sitting with discomfort, not running from it.

So next time you wonder why you're still triggered by something "small," remember: it's not small to your nervous system.

2. Stop Romanticizing Rock Bottom

Rock bottom doesn’t need aesthetic quotes or pretty metaphors. It needs compassion, sleep, and probably a therapist.

Yes, relationships will trigger your deepest unresolved wounds. Yes, you will sabotage things. No, you’re not broken-just deeply human.

Mental health struggles are real. You don’t need to glamorize them, but you also don’t need to be ashamed of them.

"It’s okay if your healing journey looks more like a crime scene than a vision board."

3. Emotional Intelligence Is Not About Being Calm All the Time

People think emotional intelligence means being zen 24/7. Newsflash: it means knowing when you’re about to spiral and texting your friend instead of exploding. It means taking a breath instead of sending that 2-page WhatsApp message at midnight.

True emotional intelligence is noticing your patterns and choosing differently, even if it’s uncomfortable.

And yes, sometimes choosing differently means choosing rest. Or boundaries. Or finally blocking your ex.

4. Healing Is a Full-Body Experience

Healing isn’t just mental. It lives in your body. That tight chest? That shallow breathing? That jaw clenching during family dinners? Yup, that’s your body storing years of unsaid things.

Try this: put one hand on your chest and breathe. Not for aesthetics. But to let your body know it’s safe now.

Your nervous system is listening. Start small. It matters.

5. You Are Allowed to Be a Work in Progress

The goal is not to become some hyper-productive, emotionally perfect robot. The goal is to feel more alive. More connected. Less ashamed.

Healing means you can be deeply aware of your flaws and still love yourself.

"You can be healing and hilarious. Sad and still hopeful. It’s not either/or."

Don’t wait until you’re "fixed" to show up in your relationships, your career, or your life. You deserve to be here now.

And: Healing is the Long Game

Healing doesn’t come with a deadline. It comes in cycles, spirals, and deeply inconvenient moments. But it comes.

Your story doesn’t need to look like anyone else's. It just needs to be yours.

So next time you’re crying in the shower or zoning out in a meeting, remember: this messy middle? It’s part of the miracle.

You’re not behind. You’re becoming.