The Loop Ends With You: Healing Habits, Hurts, and Hangups with Humor and Heart

Ever found yourself five episodes deep into a show you don’t even like, eating peanut butter from the jar with a fork? Yeah, me too. Welcome to the cycle a loop of habits, hangups, and history that we keep replaying until we finally say, “I’m done.”

This post isn’t here to shame you (or me). It’s about interrupting the loop the habits we hide behind, the trauma we keep pushing down, the addictions that quietly drain us and building something gentler, saner, and finally ours.

So let’s talk healing. Not the Instagram-aesthetic kind, but the kind that involves a few tears, a lot of laughter, and awkward dancing in your living room. Because recovery is messy and that’s exactly why it works.

1. The Habit Isn’t the Problem It’s the Escape Plan

Let’s be real: we don’t scroll, smoke, binge, or rage just for fun. We do it because it works temporarily. Whether it’s checking out with TikTok or checking into happy hour five nights a week, our habits are often survival strategies dressed up as personality quirks.

The Fix? Curiosity.

Instead of going full drill sergeant on yourself, ask: What is this habit helping me avoid? Maybe it’s grief. Maybe boredom. Maybe you’re scared of success. That’s real. But when we name it, we reclaim power from it.

Real Story:

My friend Josh used to binge energy drinks like water. Not for energy for control. Turns out, every time he felt overwhelmed, chugging a neon can was his way of saying, “I’ve got this.” When he finally stopped and asked why, he realized it wasn’t about caffeine. It was about not trusting that he could handle life without a jolt.

Now he journals. And yeah, he still drinks one Red Bull on Thursdays but not out of panic. Out of preference. Progress, not perfection.

2. Meet Your Inner Child She’s Not Mad, Just Misunderstood

You don’t need to wear a flower crown or chant in Sanskrit to do inner child work. You just need to get honest. A lot of the habits we’re trying to break come from beliefs we picked up before we could even spell "addiction."

Did someone make you feel unworthy unless you were perfect?

Did love only come when you performed, obeyed, or shrank?

Did you learn to self-soothe with food, phones, or fantasy?

Inner Child Work is basically re-parenting yourself with compassion. It can look like:

• • Saying “no” even when people expect “yes”
  • Taking naps without guilt
  • Crying when you’re sad, not just when a dog dies in a movie

Real Story:

Sami, a 30-year-old client, used to apologize every time she asked for help even when her arm was literally in a cast. Turns out, her inner child learned early on that needing others = being a burden. When we worked on rewriting that narrative, she started asking for help with pride. Her cast came off. Her courage didn’t.

3. Digital Detox: Breaking Up with the Algorithm (Before It Dumps You First)

We laugh about screen addiction, but honestly? It’s a slow burn on our nervous systems. The constant scrolling, notifications, and “I’ll just check one thing” habits don’t just waste time they hijack our dopamine, steal our attention, and leave us fried.

Signs You Might Need a Digital Reset:

• • You reach for your phone before peeing in the morning (guilty)
  • Your thumb knows how to open Instagram before your brain does
  • You feel empty after scrolling but can’t stop

Try This:

• • One no-screen morning a week (coffee with your thoughts!)
  • Delete the apps for 24 hours and notice what surfaces emotionally
  • Go analog for an hour a day a book, a walk, a journal, a board game, heck, even staring at the ceiling

Funny Story:

I tried to detox and replaced TikTok with Sudoku. Three days in, I started seeing grids in my dreams. Lesson learned: the point isn’t to swap one numbing habit for another it’s to be present. Even if presence feels boring at first.

4. Trauma Recovery Isn’t Linear It’s More Like Roller Skating Blindfolded

Healing trauma doesn’t mean you'll wake up one day and never get triggered again. It means you recognize the trigger faster, you recover sooner, and you don’t spiral as deep.

Real Talk:

You can go to therapy, do the breathwork, cry it out, and still yell at your partner over dishes. That doesn’t mean you’re broken. It means you’re human.

Helpful Practices:

• • Somatic exercises (like shaking, tapping, breathwork)
  • Trauma-informed therapy (EMDR, IFS, etc.)
  • Naming your emotional weather daily (“Today I’m cloudy with a chance of snark.”)

Real Story:

Maria, a trauma survivor, once texted her therapist mid-panic: “Is it normal to want to hide in your laundry basket after seeing your ex’s wedding photos?” Her therapist replied: “Only if it’s clean laundry.” Laughter = regulation. We heal in small, weird, human ways.

5. Breaking Cycles Is a Lifestyle Not a One-Time Thing

There’s no grand ceremony where the heavens part and your trauma is fully healed. Sorry. What you do get is this:

• • Better boundaries
  • Clearer self-talk
  • Peaceful mornings
  • Healthier relationships
  • The deep knowing that you’re not your patterns

The real miracle?

That moment when you pause before reacting and choose something different. That’s cycle-breaking. That’s evolution. That’s freedom.

Mini Wins That Matter:

• • You skipped doomscrolling and took a walk
  • You said “no” and didn’t over-explain
  • You cried and didn’t apologize for it

Every little shift builds a new pattern one that you chose.

AND: You’re Not Late to Heal

If you’re reading this thinking “ugh, I should have done this years ago,” stop. You’re right on time. The cycle ends now. Because you’re awake. Aware. Willing. That’s enough.

And remember, healing isn’t a solo mission. Bring your friends. Call your therapist. Talk to your dog. Or just start by being radically honest with yourself. That’s how all the best stories begin.